On my recent absence from the internet

During the past few months, I’ve been notably absent from my blog, and my only posts have been ones that were scheduled/planned long in advance.

There was a reason.

Not so long ago, my grandfather had a heart attack. As he was about to be released from the hospital, we learned he had cancer. My family has always been very close, and this was like a nightmare had become real. Yes, we always knew that this day would one day come, but we didn’t expect it to be quite so soon, or quite so drawn out.

From the time I heard the news, I spent every weekend that I could spare visiting him in Pennsylvania. He always told the best stories, and we sat around eagerly to hear them while we still could. I did what I’d sworn I’d never do and bought a car (his car) so I could go back and forth more easily. And while the past month and a half was both physically and emotionally exhausting, I’m grateful that we had that time together.

I’m lucky to have had such an amazing grandfather, and will always cherish the memories we had together. He taught me to use Napster back in the good old days of the internet, when the legality of it all was somewhat more ambiguous. When I first moved to DC, he told me about his experiences there back when he was a truck driver, and was sent to make a delivery to a building that hadn’t yet been built. He told us about taking my grandmother waterskiing among the alligators in Florida. On the day of the Women’s March, he told me he was proud of me and would look for me on TV.

We lost my grandfather a week and a half ago, and it still feels raw and unreal. I’m going to miss him a lot. But I am slowly easing myself into my old routines, and hope to be back here in full swing soon.

15 thoughts on “On my recent absence from the internet

  1. Oh no, I’m so sorry to hear this. What a wonderful man he must have been:-) Napster! There’s a word I haven’t heard in a while:-D

  2. Oh my goodness Grace I’m so sorry to hear about your grandad. I won’t give you any platitudes – you’ll come to terms with it in your own way after all and I know that I really missed my gran after she passed away because we were so close. But, like you, she told us so many stories – and I loved her stories and wish I’d written some of them down – but, as it is, I now tell those stories to my family and so it’s like she’s still with me in a way.
    Lynn 😀

    1. I want to write down as many as I can remember before I start forgetting them. I don’t want them to go away. And he was joking around right up until the end. He had such a wonderful sense of humor. When I bought the car he told me if I didn’t change the oil every 5,000 miles he was going to come back and shut it off while I’m driving down the beltway. 😛

      1. Definitely write them down – it’s amazing how you think you will remember every detail but little things just eventually evade you. You could make a little book of stories just for you and your family. And – make sure you change that oil. 😀

  3. Grandparents hold such special places in our lives that it is horribly painful to lose them. Hold all of your memories close to your heart where you can easily pull them out when you need a smile. Memories are so important!

  4. Grace, I’m so sorry! It sounds like you’re fortunate to have had such a close relationship. I don’t have any wise words but I’ll be thinking of you.

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